Ryan’s Perverse Universe

There’s lots to do in preparation for my exchange to Madrid, though I think I have done most of them.  All that’s left is to secure accomodation, buy insurance and apply for the visa, which I cannot do until I have settled everything.  So far, I have:

1.  Chosen subjects.  Unfortunately, they needed to be convertible to NUS subjects.  I could still choose them, but the credits wouldn’t count.  I would rather spend my free time exploring Spain!

2. Bought Air Tickets.  There are no direct flights to Madrid, as Barcelona is where most people travel to.  Therefore, I will have to spend some time in transit.

3.  Photocopied all the important documents like passport, acceptance letters etc.  Also got passport photos to apply for various things.

4.  Applied for a room, but now waiting for reply.  The agency will help me look around too, for a cost of 200 euro.  Ouch.

Now waiting with crossed fingers.

This was the weirdest birthday lunch we have ever had.  It started with our dept. mtg.

Me: It being Liz’s birthday, let’s have pizza, her favourite food!

Z: PIZZA?  (Said dramatically and in disbelief, along the lines of ‘you call that food?’)

Pris: (Unfazed) Yes, it’s Liz’s favourite, so it’s great to celebrate her birthday!

Z: But PIZZA?

(This close to telling her it’s not her birthday, and wondering why she can’t eat something else despite being a pizza place)

Me: We can have our pizza at Amici, they have other kinds of food there and it’s quite nice.

Z: I don’t understand why we have to eat Pizza, I mean, there are better types of food out there.

Me:  It’s ok, Amici has other kinds of food.

Z: Yah, but it’s so weird to eat pizza to celebrate a birthday.

(We decided not to argue and just go ahead with our own plans.  Later Liz thought Amici was too ex, silly girl, and suggested Mad Jack instead.)

At Mad Jack’s there was a special deal where everyone got a free slice of cake.  7 different cakes came our way and Z immediately asked ‘can I have that one?’ without even asking the birthday girl to make the first choice!

Surprisingly, Pris said no and took the cake away.  I told Z that we were sharing.

Z: Umm, can we cut the cakes into little pieces so we don’t have to eat each other’s saliva?

(Liz, the birthday girl started cutting away)

Me: Don’t worry Liz, we’ll just cut for Lee Lee, the rest of us are fine to share.

Z: It’s my ration, is it?  What if I want more? (jokingly)

Me: You can eat from the other end… (exasperated)

I am FURIOUS.  We have 10 cases that we are supposed to do in a group for class.  We work on the basis of giving our recommendations, and someone compiles it.

1.  Group member, called A, has consistently only handed in her comments at the last minute.  These comments are often inconsequential because a) she has not read the case until the last minute, b) she has not bothered to read the related chapters, c) she has not done much thinking on it.

2.  When put in charge of a case, A did not even bother reading the case, again until the last minute.  She had no comments or thoughts during discussion.  Even when the case was put together, it was slipshod work.  Formatting, grammar was horrendous.

3.  There was discussion that the 4 of us would take turns leading the cases.  All agreed, and therefore, the Xth case should have been done by K.  However, it was not done, and on the night before the case was due, another team-mate and I had to scramble to finish it.

4.  I wanted to find out more about why this happened.  K denied the discussion ever happened, that she didn’t know that she was assigned the case.  This infuriated me even more, if that was possible. 

a)  The first two cases were done by another team-mate and me, and the last remaining team-mate has said earlier on that he wasn’t in town.

b)  She argued that no one keeps track of who did what case which infuriated me more, because not only was she not doing any work, she didn’t appreciate that the other 3 were holding the fort and covering her ass, so that she has any marks at all. 

c) There was no apology whatsoever.  She even said that all the communication was assumed.  ASSUMED!?  What part of ‘You’re supposed to do the next case right?  How is that going?’  ASSUMED that she’s doing the case?

5) She had asked me to do the case saying she would not be in during the weekend, which I replied that I could not do it since I was busy with work, which was why I handed in my case about 2 weeks early.  I suggested that she do it during the week.  If you are in charge of a case, and could not do it, wouldn’t you:

a) Find someone else who could, rather expect someone to find your replacement for you?

b) If you had some weekend holiday plans, why couldn’t you find some way to do it earlier?

c) And if you couldn’t do either, shouldn’t you have informed someone earlier, rather than the week before and expect people to ‘understand’?

6) Who takes a biathlon when you have a full-time job and studying part-time?  Do you seriously think that when you’re already marginally passing, you can afford the time to join a biathlon and devote time to training?

AARRRGGGHHHH

Life was good for a while.  We managed our own schedules and made sure that things were ontime.  Then came the new boss, who showed much promise at first.  She seemed to understand the branding aspects and the requirements for strategy.  Unfortunately, she seems to know nothing of execution.

Now, we have our Awards ceremony looming and we’re rushing to get things done, while trying to serve her needs, with requests for information and her wanting to do a branding document at this peak period.

Telling her this was our peak period didn’t work either - she simply asked us to do things simultaneously, similar to a certain someone.  Getting tired of them getting 3/4 cooked bosses for us repeatedly, and really wondering when this will end.  Perhaps it would have been better for us to work with no boss, because every time we have one, we just end up unable to complete our work on time.  Then the fault lies on us.  *sigh*

The past year has been a process in brainwashing.  From being concerned about the best way to do things, to being worried about people’s opinions on me.  Of course, it was not my doing, it was someone I was working with, who would jab or kick us when we wished to speak up.  She didn’t know her own strength of course, or that she left bruises on one of my colleagues.

She would then tell us that we did not know of the politics that were raging ‘above’ by the powers that be.  At first, I was swayed, because I had heard wind of some politics.  Her words made it seem like it was a lot more.  Being humans, we naturally believe the worst.

However, as time went by, it was clear that her words were bullshit, designed to cover her incompetency.  True, her boss was completely incompetent, unable to write, analyse or even understand figures.  She was slightly better, but not by much.  Her incompetence with the computer, her lack of planning skills and vague communications left us scrambling to clean up her shit as they happened.  Worst of all, she liked to be fast (in sending out instructions), which meant she was creating shit a lot faster. 

I started off telling her that people cannot work faster, without improvements in process or extra resources, or there would be problems.  Unfortunately, my advice fell on deaf ears and she kept demanding us to work faster, and faster.

Frustrated by her stupidity and after she made our rankings fall, I chose to ignore her requests.  I would just smile and let her say what she wanted and get on with my work. 

Of course, I am not without my faults too.  I let myself be rushed.  While I used to take 3 days for a piece of work (so that I could review it day after day with a fresh eye), these days I try to give it within the day, with disastrous consequences.  I will have to learn to get back to my old way of doing things.  Anyway, she is leaving, so life should return to normal.

My birthday celebrations actually started a week ago, with a surprise cake.  I got a book from A&M, a wallet from Edwin and paper voodoo dolls from Rohana and Siao Ee.

Today, I was told there was a meeting with a vendor.  I rushed there, with my notebook to find the room dark.  Opening the door, I found the 4th floor gang yelling, “SURPRISE!”

There was a wonderfully moist chocolate cake and mini doughnuts. 

But the greatest part was, this was my first cake for my birthday in NCSS.  I was touched to know that Lianne had gone to the effort to ask almost everyone I knew in NCSS to come and celebrate.  She had started planning 2 weeks ago, and she had gone into great effort, especially since she’s been busy with work and personal matters.

I feel really blessed to have such great colleagues.

In the course of my gardening, I follow the philosophy that I should never force my plants to flower.  Many plant sellers use hormones to force the plants to flower before they are ready, to prepare them for sale.  What this does is that it drains the plant to the point that they may take many months to recover after the episode.  Some may even die.

Instead, I believe that if I give my plants the right conditions, they will flower.

Similarly, with humans, I hate bosses who force their staff to work faster and harder without providing the necessary things essential for their growth.  How often do you hear bosses who just say, ‘you have to work faster, things are moving fast now?’

However, they have never thought about giving you training, the necessary time or thought ahead to pave the way for you.  How fast can you make a process without IT support or changing the process?  Sadly, there are many bosses who are not aware of this.  (And it makes you wonder why they are a boss in the first place.)

‘Shopping’ used to be a word we dreaded as a family.  Because ’shopping’ usually meant waiting around for my mom to look at each and every single garment hanging off the racks, for her to consider and pick.  When she had finally picked one, she would hesitate, because she would think about saving the money, as being poor was her greatest fear.  We languished for hours, unable to leave, since it was the time before the invention of mobile phones.

However, shopping today turned out to be quite wonderful.  I did not intend to buy anything, as the cheap stuff were too elaborate for me, while the stuff I did like were available in Singapore.  So we chose clothes for my younger brother.  In doing so, I discovered to my delight, that Chloe and I shared similar taste in colour combinations and clothes.  Of course, she’s the best-dressed one in the family.

We both dislike beige (which Justin liked) and we do not believe in monochrome pairings as it is too lazy (esp. blue shirt with blue jeans).  Chloe is growing up into a nice young lady.  When she did not like something, she would put it across as something that she did not like but did not imply that the person had poor fashion sense.

It’s not that she has been bad.  She’s always been sweet since young, and thus was loved by everyone when she was growing up.  She’s never insistent or selfish.  If anything, she’s always willing to share and give up things.  For example, sharing a room with Justin when he’s afraid to sleep by himself.

Anyway, shopping with the family turned out to be fun.  We got stuff for Justin and Mei.  My mom looked around a little, but did not buy anything.  I guess she’s still worried about money, especially with the economic crisis in full force.

We finished up shopping and headed to Brunei in the car.  Our conversations always happen in the car, as we are usually distracted by the TV or internet when we are home.  However, when we do talk, we joke a lot and bring up the past a lot too.

So we talked and sang.  Yes, all of our siblings love to sing.  Rachael sings the softest, but she has the sweetest voice.  Justin has .. erm wonderful volume.

Reaching Tutong at close to dinner time, we ate at “Tandakasih” which my siblings thought of as a horribly complicated name.  They call it ‘Qiao Tou’, which means ‘Front of the Bridge’.  So functional.  Anyway, the mee soto was fantastic, as was its Tom Yum soup.  I wish there were more meat though, as Brunei food tends to be more carbo-heavy.

Justin and I then landed at Wywy’s, an internet cafe similar to Mac’s where you can sit practically the whole day after buying just a drink.  It is quite nice, which Malay ballads playing, movies showing and comfy booths all under soft lighting.

Anyway, 1.5 days before I head back to Singapore.  I may miss Brunei after all.

I was waiting to check-in on my plane, when a lady asked me if we could check-in together.  She said that she was overweight by 5 kgs, because of the goodies and all, so needed to borrow my check-in luggage weight allowance.  Otherwise, she would have to pay the surcharges.

I was tempted to help.  However, given this day and age, when people get hanged for drugs, and you could possibly accept a load of bombs, I decided not to help.  I smiled and gave her a weak excuse that I had packed books in and therefore, was likely close to being overweight anyway.

She said that we could just try and that if I were uncomfortable, I could check her luggage.  It being Chinese New Year, I was really, really tempted to be charitable, but again, I decided not to.  It was not worth the risk, and she should really have a) weighed the bags before leaving and b) just pay the surcharge instead of inconveniencing other people.

I then said truthfully that I was not comfortable with the idea.  She took it well and said she understood.  She then approached another guy in the queue, who readily agreed.  Alas, it was not to be, because he was close to being overweight and he really had books in his luggage.  The guy apologised for not being able to help, to which she good-naturedly thanked him for having the heart to help.  I dared not look at her to see if she was looking my way.  I still had 10kgs spare capacity.

If not for all the worry on terrorist attacks and hangings these days, I would have helped. Anyway, on board the plane, the travel advisory said not to help people with their luggage.  So, I’m just playing safe. ;P

You reminisce more.  Met up with Thomas today and had a good chat over several hours.  We had not really met up for more than a decade due to our reasons geographical and chronological.

Thomas and I were neighbours when we were both very little.  Since he was one of the few kids around my age, we hung out together a lot.  That, and because he had a micro-genius.  I went over to his house quite often to watch him play.  We went to different primary schools but ended up in the same.

We lost contact when I went to Melbourne to study, and he, the UK.  It was 1996 then and the internet was not widespread then, though I knew of it.  Thus, we only heard about each other from our parents, who still contacted each other.

Thomas and I began our exchange slowly, over facebook, with short messages here and there.  A few days ago, I decided that it was time to catch up again, and dropped Thomas a message, asking if he was free to catch up.  Luckily, he was and he sounded enthusiastic about it.

Today, we caught up properly and he told me about his job, how he never did any electrical engineering related work, despite his electrical engineering degree.  He was now doing Internal Auditing with a bank.  We exchanged notes on friends, and talked about how things had *not* changed, still.

Two hours passed by quickly.  We then arranged to head to Seria, where our old school, St. Michael’s lay.  He had to pay a parking fine, which had to be paid in the district in which it was incurred.  He dropped by St. Michael’s which had been shut down for a few years.  I marvelled at how it still look the same, 15 years after I had left it.

We toured the inside and images flooded into my mind, clichely, like a bad soap, I saw myself running across the field during the lunch break, racing Cih Hang, which was an impossible task since he had long legs (and was damn proud of them).  We had to race if we wanted something hot - as the food ran out quickly.  Sometimes, I didn’t race, but asked Cih Hang politely to help me ‘book’ a bowl.

I also noticed that they had a women’s toilet.  (It was a boy’s school.)  I suppose the lady teachers had to go somewhere.  They never provided toilet paper, so the walls were smeared with sh!t, when you went.  I always prayed that I would never have a tummy ache in school.

After that, we went to the town centre, paid Thomas’ fine and toured our old hangout - Plaza Seria, where I had spent many dollars playing video games at JJ.  It looked much smaller than I remembered it.

On the whole, Seria had not changed much, but for some demolitions and additions.  The famous food stalls were gone, replaced by a concrete hawker centre, that I heard serve sub-par food.  The wooden hotel was now bricks and mortar.  The bus station where I had wasted many hours waiting was still there, unchanged.  I wondered if they had even repainted it over the many years.

We stopped to chat in Jollibee in Seria Plaza, while waiting for my parents to pick me up, to head towards Miri, Sarawak.  It felt really good to catch up with another old friend.